Out Pops The Truth
by Kyoto-chan
Summary: Sora and Roxas have a really stupid argument. [Kindasortalika RikuSoraKai and AkuRoku, rated for language]


A/N: This little idea alllll started out on the SPPf Kingdom Hearts Ships thread (fourth page), when someone (Ryuko, to be exact) mentioned Axel/Kairi and thought about how two insane minds in one body (Sora and Roxas, if you guys are slow) wouldn't be good at all.

That was a few weeks ago. A few nights ago, I had the insane idea to write a fic based upon that idea. Thus, this crack!fic. XD

**Disclaimer: I no own Kingdom Hearts. If I did, trust me, I wouldn't be writing fics. Also, Nii-san (OkashiraShinomori) was the one who thought of the title. XD**

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Out Pops The Truth

by Kyoto-chan

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It was the average day on Destiny Islands. Sunny, and no clouds in si - wait, is that a cloud? No, it was just a flock of seagulls. _Anyway_, it was sunny and there were no clouds in sight.

Sora was lounging around (as usual) around the beach, just talking with Kairi. No Riku in sight, he just wanted to spend some time with her.

"...and on Selphie's fifteenth birthday, we had a party at the beach. She walked straight into a palm tree! You should've been there!" Kairi laughed, recalling her oh-so-wonderful memory.

Sora laughed, imagining the scene in his own eyes.

Namine asked (making it look like Kairi was talking to herself), "Selphie's that hyper brown-haired girl, right?"

Both Sora and Kairi answered for her.

"Yep!"

Sora sighed, "I basically have nothing to talk about...I mean, in the whole year I was separated from you guys, I can't remember a single thing...well, Roxas remembers what happened, but that's just what happened in _his_ eyes. He only remembers what happened to him while he was in the Organization, and every time he happened to be around me. Other than that, it's all a blank..."

"...I remember..." Namine said softly. "It was basically revolved around me, anyway..."

Sora smiled slightly. "Yeah, I guess it was."

Kairi finally spoke up. "You know how Axel kidnapped me at Twilight Town, right?"

Sora nodded.

"Well...the kidnapping was publicly known...but there was something else that happened..."

"_Something else?_"

"Yeah...but not what you think it was! We just talked for a while...then he began to flatter me, by saying things like 'You're really pretty, you know that?'..."

Both Sora and Roxas exclaimed in unison (although it looked like just Sora was yelling), "He said _WHAT_?"

"Axel's _GAY_, he's not _supposed_ to sound straight!" Roxas pouted, taking over Sora's body for a split second, then Sora took control again.

Sora scolded, "Roxas, what did I say about taking over my body without any warning?"

"Too bad, I share this body with you, so you're just gonna have to deal with it!" Sora-Roxas smirked.

"And how do you know Axel's _gay_?"

Sora-Roxas paused for a moment.

"'Cause I just _do_," he flushed.

Sora grinned, "I feel heat at my cheeks, Roxas."

"It's the middle of freaking summer!"

"I didn't feel it until now! You realize that I can always access your memories from when you were in the Organization, right?"

"...Sora, you do that, and I _swear_ I'll commit suicide in your body, just to take you down with me."

"Too late."

A pause.

"ROXAS, WHATTHE_FUCK_? YOUDIDN'TTELLMEYOUKISSED_BOYS_! YOUNEVERMENTIONEDTHATYOU'REFREAKING_GAY_!"

"I'M NOT GAY, I'M _BISEXUAL_! JUST LIKE _YOU_!"

"I'M NOT BI, WHAT THE HELL ARE _YOU_ ON!"

"Sora, I _share a body with you_."

"I'M STILL NOT BI! I'M STRAIGHT, GODDAMMIT!"

"_You_ have a _crush_ on _both_ Kairi and Riku."

"I DO NOT! I LOVE KAIRI AND ONLY KAIRI!"

Kairi flushed.

"_Riiiiiight_. That's what you say when _she's right there_. You were staring at Riku's ass an hour ago."

Sora growled, and turned bright red.

"Well, you slept with _Axel_!"

Sora-Roxas frowned.

"_Nearly_ slept!"

"You were down to your boxers and Axel was completely naked!"

"I STILL HAVE MY VIRGINITY, DON'T I? And _you_, mister, have _very_ dirty thoughts of an orgy with Kairi and Riku."

"I do _not_!"

"I live in your mind, dammit. I know everything you think. _Ev-er-y-thing_."

Sora had to admit...arguing with your Nobody was kind of hard.

"Then tell me what I was thinking five minutes ago!"

"'Damn, Kairi's hot,'" Sora-Roxas smirked.

A Sora with a red to rival Kairi's hair on his cheeks stammered, "W-WRONG!"

"True, you think that every ten minutes. Along with 'Riku's hot, too'."

Kairi and Namine would've very well died of laughter from the two Others having their argument, but they didn't want to be rude.

_I wanna stop 'em, but this is just too fun to watch..._ both females thought, suppressing a laugh that desperately wanted to escape their mouth(s).

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A/N: It's really stupid, I know. XD

I can't help but think it wasn't as funny in the end as it was in the middle...T.T

R&R! Flames will be eaten by fire-proof plot bunnies!


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